Dentist Disaster

Jordan's 6 month dental cleaning yesterday morning was an event. I'm convinced I will never fully understand kids this age. She's been to this dentist twice already, and has loved it. She calls their toothbrush a tickle toothbrush and likes it when the dentist counts her teeth. She likes the chair. She likes the free pink toothbrush she gets at the end. She doesn't flinch at the flossing. Piece o' cake.

First of all, the office staff in this place is unbelievable. They make the girls from Jersey Shore look professional. Super thick makeup, dyed teased hair, plunging necklines, tattoos, spike heels. The works. Kind of makes you wonder about the two dentists.... (both male) Then when one of them is reading me back my address to confirm that it hasn't changed, and she's like "Wow. That's a cool ass address!" Really? This is a pediatric office. Of course I've said every word in the book in front of my kids, but I think I'd do better in a doctor's office...

Anyway, the waiting area was literally 90 degrees. Maybe that's what set Jordan off. Or the loud Scooby-Doo movie with ghosts and monsters. (Again, probably not the best choice for a kids' dentist office) At any rate, when we were called back and it was time for Jordan to get in the chair, she FLIPPED OUT. Full throttle screaming and kicking (I had to take off her cowboy boots before she hurt someone), hysterical, tried to run out the door. Of course, Jacob had to add his two cents (he was already pissed about the hot waiting room). The hygienist was patient, let Jo feel the toothbrush, push the pedal, told her it was PINK PRINCESS (magic words to my child) bubblegum toothpaste; nothing worked. I had no idea what to do, I really thought we were going to have to leave, which meant next time would be 10X worse. But the hygienist called in a helper, a grandmotherly type, who talked Jordan down. After that, all was fine, she collected her prizes, and "played" dentist the rest of the day. Over and over that afternoon Jordan and I alternated between who was the dentist and who was the patient. I guess that's how little kids deal with scary stuff, they make a game out of it.